Overcoming Social Anxiety & Making Friends

Turning Social Stress into Social Success

Many autistic young adults want to make friends but feel unsure about how to start conversations, keep them going, or build meaningful connections. Social interactions can be exhausting, confusing, or stressful, leading to avoidance or isolation.

Fear of saying the wrong thing, struggling with small talk, or feeling misunderstood can make socialising difficult. For some, group settings feel overwhelming, while others find it hard to initiate friendships. With the right strategies, social confidence can grow, and forming friendships can become easier and more natural.

Strategies to Build Social Confidence

Start with Small, Comfortable Interactions – Social confidence builds over time. Begin with small, low-pressure conversations, like greeting a neighbour or chatting with a shop assistant, before working up to longer interactions.
Practise Conversation Starters – Knowing what to say can reduce anxiety. Prepare simple conversation openers, like asking about someone’s interests, commenting on a shared experience, or using open-ended questions to keep a chat flowing.
Use Scripts for Common Situations – Predictable social settings, like ordering food or making small talk, can feel easier with prepared scripts. Practising these can build confidence for spontaneous conversations.
Find Common Interests – Friendships are built on shared experiences. Joining clubs, gaming groups, or hobby-based meetups can make it easier to connect with like-minded people naturally.

Navigating Social Situations with Confidence

Understand Social Cues & Body Language – Eye contact, tone of voice, and facial expressions can be difficult to interpret. Learning common non-verbal cues can make interactions smoother and less stressful.
Know When to Take Breaks – Socialising can be tiring, especially in group settings. Taking breaks, setting time limits for interactions, or planning quiet recovery time can prevent social exhaustion.
Set Boundaries in Friendships – Not all social interactions are positive. Learning how to recognise one-sided friendships, say no when needed, and establish personal boundaries is key to healthy relationships.
Practise Handling Awkward Moments – Everyone experiences awkward interactions. Instead of avoiding them, learning simple ways to move past small missteps—like laughing it off or shifting the conversation—can ease social pressure.

Making & Maintaining Friendships

Take Initiative in Friendships – Waiting for others to make the first move can lead to missed opportunities. Sending a message, inviting someone for coffee, or suggesting an activity can strengthen friendships.
Learn to Navigate Conflict – Disagreements happen in all friendships. Knowing how to address misunderstandings calmly and directly can help maintain long-term relationships.
Stay Connected in a Way That Works for You – Not all friendships require constant interaction. Finding a balance between in-person catch-ups, online communication, and personal time makes maintaining relationships easier.
Be Yourself – Masking can be exhausting. Finding friendships where you feel accepted and comfortable as your authentic self leads to deeper, more meaningful connections.

Social Skills Can Be Learned & Improved

Building social confidence is a process, and small steps make a big difference. With practice, structure, and the right strategies, making and keeping friendships can become easier and more enjoyable.

What to Learn More?

If social anxiety or making friends feels overwhelming, we’re here to help. Contact Purposeful Connections today to learn how our mentoring services can support social confidence and connection.